what to do…
Give yourself some credit
I love Reese Witherspoon. In one of her speeches, she describes a line that often appears in movies – where the woman turns to the man and asks ”what do we do now?”.
A woman knows what to do. Be it a crisis situation or not. Give yourself some credit, you’ve been through many stormy situations in your life and looking back, I’m sure you made it through OK. But for some reason, we battle with self-doubt and constantly seek reassurance from other people even though we know deep down exactly how to handle the situation.
Change the What to How
As soon as a difficult situation arises, our minds are tricked into thinking ”what” – which is such an open-ended word that we feel overwhelmed and think ”I don’t know what to do.” Stay calm and think clearly – you do know. I think where we get stuck is that we don’t necessarily know HOW to do what we know we have to do or what has to be done, if that makes sense? So we get caught up thinking that we can’t figure this thing out but as Marie Forleo says: Everything is Figure-outable! By changing the ‘what’ to ‘how’, your mind shifts into a step-by-step problem solving mode (well, my mind does). ‘How’ is breaking up the task (what) into smaller, more manageable pieces. ‘How’ is figure-outable! This switch has really helped me in the past.
For example, I am underweight at the moment. I got quite a fright when it dawned on me that none of my pants fit me and that I really don’t look healthy. So what do I do? I know I need to gain weight but how am I going to do it in a healthy way? Step 1: Do some research (I am the queen of Google). I could have just stopped here and added heaps of carbs to my diet but did I mention that I’m breastfeeding? I realised that I needed to make the right adjustments. Step 2: Visit a dietician. Step 3: Adjust my diet. It turns out that I need to include more protein into my diet because my actual muscle mass is too low. So I would have just loaded the carbs to no avail if I hadn’t put the ”how” into action! This is a silly example but I’m sure you get the picture.
Here are a few more tips to overcoming self-doubt and becoming more confident in your own decisions:
Pause & reflect – think back to a time you were in a similar situation and analyse the outcome
Nourish your body – your brain can’t be in top form if your eating habits aren’t healthy
Keep affirmations – write down positive things people say to you in a journal
Call a friend – your friends know your strengths and weaknesses and can give you great advise
Celebrate your wins – no matter how big or small
I hope this article helps to boost your confidence because I truly believe that you do know what to do!
“Believe in yourself, your abilities and your own potential. Never let self-doubt hold you captive. You are worthy of all that you dream of and hope for.”